Week 1-2: Let It Sink In
You're allowed to feel whatever you're feeling. Relief. Grief. Fear. All of these at once. There's no "right" way to feel about a diagnosis.
Download a free parent-friendly template to request an EHC needs assessment. Check and adapt it for your family's circumstances before sending.
Get the free template →🧠 Need to talk?
- National Autistic Society: request a non-urgent Parent-to-Parent emotional-support callback.
- Urgent mental health in Kent and Medway: call NHS 111 and select the mental-health option.
- Someone to listen: call Samaritans on 116 123 at any time.
What you CAN do now:
- Get the diagnosis letter — ask for copies for your records
- Tell your child's school — they should start supporting straight away (even without an EHCP)
- Register with Kent Local Offer — kent.gov.uk
- Start a folder — keep copies of everything
Month 1: The Basics
1. Apply for DLA (Disability Living Allowance)
This is non-means tested — your income doesn't matter. It can be up to £194.60/week (2026-27 rates).
- Apply online: gov.uk
- Evidence tip: Keep a dated diary showing the child's full pattern of care and mobility needs compared with a child of the same age. Do not record only the hardest day.
- Decision time: DWP does not promise a fixed 8–12 week decision. Ask for the current estimate and report relevant changes while the claim is pending.
2. Tell Key People
- School / nursery / childminder
- Health visitor / school nurse
- GP
- Family (if you want)
3. Request a School SEN Support Meeting
Schools must identify and meet SEN under the SEND Code of Practice. They don't need an EHCP to provide support.
Month 2-3: Building Support
1. Consider an EHCP (Education, Health and Care Plan)
An EHCP records assessed needs, outcomes, provision and placement. The local authority must secure the special educational provision specified in Section F. In Kent, you can request an EHC needs assessment through:
- Online: Kent County Council
- Deadline: They have 6 weeks to decide whether to assess
- Diagnosis: You do not need one to request an EHC needs assessment; the legal test concerns possible SEN and possible need for provision through an EHCP
2. Explore Therapies
Check the Relevant Service
Speech and language therapy, occupational therapy and mental-health pathways use different referral criteria and waiting lists. Do not rely on a single countywide estimate: ask the responsible NHS service for its current time to triage, first appointment and treatment, and ask what support is available while waiting. Private care is optional, not a prerequisite for school or statutory support.
See the therapist directory and verify every provider's current registration, scope, fees and availability directly.
3. Connect with Other Parents
- Kent PACT — Parents and Carers Together
- Kent Autistic Trust — check its current community-support services and eligibility
- Local Facebook groups — search "Kent autism parents" or "SEND [your town]"
4. Sensory Tools That Make Daily Life Easier
You don't need to spend a fortune. A few well-chosen sensory tools can dramatically reduce overwhelm at home, in the car, and at school. No product works for every child; compare these ideas with the child's needs and professional advice where appropriate:
- Best Sensory Toys for Autism — 7 product categories to compare
- Noise Cancelling Headphones — for shops, school, transport
- Weighted Blankets — calming for sleep and meltdowns
- Sensory Product Ideas — products organised by sensory need, with availability checked in July 2026
Product links include Amazon affiliate codes. Disclosure.
📋 Downloadable Checklist
Print this out and tick as you go:
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I need a diagnosis to get support?
No. Schools must support children with SEN regardless of diagnosis. You can request an EHCP assessment without a diagnosis. However, a diagnosis helps, especially for secondary school transition and post-16 support.
How much is DLA for an autistic child?
It varies. For 2026/27, the care component ranges from £30.30 to £114.60 a week and the mobility component is £30.30 or £80.00 a week. The award depends on the statutory care and mobility tests, not the diagnosis. Check GOV.UK for current rates.
Can I work if my child has autism?
Yes. A diagnosis itself does not create an adult benefit entitlement. You may qualify for Carer's Allowance if all conditions are met, including at least 35 hours of care, qualifying middle- or highest-rate DLA care for the child, and earnings of £204 or less a week after permitted deductions in 2026/27. Carer's Allowance can affect other benefits, so check GOV.UK or get a benefits check.
What if my child's school isn't helping?
First, request a meeting with the SENCO and put concerns in writing. If SEN Support is not enough, a parent, young person or school can request an EHC needs assessment. If the local authority makes an appealable decision, check the decision letter and deadline; national outcome statistics do not predict an individual appeal.
Next Steps
Related Guides
DLA for Autistic Children
Claim Disability Living Allowance — up to £194.60/week, no diagnosis required. Apply now.
Read guide →EHCP Application in Kent
Step-by-step guide to applying for an EHCP. Diagnosis is not required.
Read guide →NHS vs Private Assessment
Still waiting for NHS? Your options including free Right to Choose.
Read guide →Autism-Friendly Activities in Kent
Sensory sessions, quiet spaces, and inclusive clubs across Kent.
Read guide →Melatonin Autism UK: What Actually Helps Autistic Children's Sleep
Sleep often breaks down in the months after diagnosis. The rare evidence-positive autism guide — what actually works on the NHS.
Read guide →